He used to tell me how perfect I was for him..he would work through anything to be with me, God sent me to him, etc.
He appeared to be doing these passive -aggressive things to see how far he could push me until I would tell him to F-off (which I did), but why wouldn't he (or anyone) just come to me and tell me that he is bothered by whatever the problem is, communicate about it, and then come up with a solution regardless of what the solution would have been. If you don't want to be with someone, just have the respect to tell the person you love that you don't think this is the right relationship for you. I'm 'asking a guy', because he is one, no other reason.
This is not abnormal behavior for someone with issues (depression) and is usually something they regret having (eg.. they end up dwelling over the fact it happened after.. He may have displayed some of these traits when you first met..
and when he realised that he actually had you, and that you both loved each other, he was able to control his depression (rather, it did not control him or maybe did not peak its ugly head).. To answer your questions Joe1) yes, i told him time and time again....period. It's a control/abuse issue and that's the way some play it.
now a new reality of marriage is set in, the depression wants to take control again. The way to deal with these things is to let it out, talk about it, work on ways to rid thoughts and emotions that cause it from your life. however depression being shame in the eyes of the holder, so it is not always easy to let it out to someone you love.. In the past, I did the passive aggressive thing as well. Even though the words were said and the thought came to mind, it's still just some friendly kidding. he would admit fault then continue.2) i don't know why 'I' allowed it to get to the breaking point. If you know anyone that needs a sexy expensive size 4 wedding dress, lol, let me know. Yep, and this would be classic for a passive-aggressive—behave your way out of a situation you don’t want to be in, rather than discuss it as a rational adult. They will start off by acting like your best "girlfriend" and get your guard down and thinking that he's something special. Or will only show it/ give it when they get everything their way!