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If he walked into a bar, you’d probably go, “Oh, there’s a white guy.” At our focus group on online dating in Manhattan, Derek got on Ok Cupid and let us watch as he went through his options.These were women whom Ok Cupid had selected as potential matches for him based on his profile and the site’s algorithm.

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But dealing with this new digital romantic world can be a lot of work.

Answering messages, filtering profiles—it’s not always fun.

As of this writing, 38% of Americans who describe themselves as “single and looking” have used an online-­dating site.

It’s not just my ­generation—boomers are as likely as college kids to give online dating a whirl.

The question nagged at me—not least because of my own experiences watching promising relationships peter out over text message—so I set out on a mission.