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Ella Dawson has herpes, and talking about it is sort of her thing.

She writes herpes-themed erotica; she gave a TED talk about herpes; and is the author of “Why I Love Telling People I Have Herpes” and “Why I Celebrate the Day I Was Diagnosed with Herpes.” All this, and she’s only had two outbreaks — which is a pretty standard herpes experience.

A revealing interview with three men on highlights the problem of having sex too early in the relationship.

Some of the issues of being intimate too early in the relationship are: Some men might not get any impression of a woman from the amount of time she waits, while some men think a woman sleeping too early in the relationship is a "deal breaker".

But I’ve had two herpes outbreaks and I was able to go to work and nobody knew what was going on, and I just took Tylenol and Valtrex and I was fine. And there are people who have more serious strains of herpes and it can mess with your body in different ways. He was flirting with me and invited me to his hotel, basically. A mistake that I made when I was still newly diagnosed was I would frequently tell somebody with a lot of, “I’m so sorry, I hope this doesn’t change the way you think of me.” I set them up to think it’s a really scary thing.

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